Embracing life’s oscillations
I initially planned to write about a book called CEO Tools. However, I decided to postpone that for next week because I wanted to share something more personal—a book that currently only exists as notes and research on my computer.
I feel compelled to discuss this because the words you’re reading now emerged only after practicing some of the ideas I’ve been researching.
It’s early.
I didn’t get much sleep.
I was under significant stress yesterday, and it looked like it was spilling into today. I have a lot on my plate with the show and my other business ventures. I’m also preparing for a so-called “family vacation” with my in-laws.
In reality, it’s an annual pilgrimage into my wife’s family history of trauma, and I’ve been navigating this complex dynamic for two decades while managing a family business for them. Suze and I have been attending counseling to help manage the impact on our relationship. The combination of dealing with toxic people and the general ups and downs of life left me in a really bad place this morning.
Just before these words began to flow, my stress levels were peaking. I felt it in my shoulders and struggled to finish any work. My anxiety was rising as I felt trapped in a loop—an emotional downward spiral.
I chose to write this more for therapeutic reasons than anything else. I figured, why not share what I’ve been up to, where it might lead, and how it’s already helping? You might find yourself in a similar situation, so let’s give you a roadmap out.
Within moments of deciding to write this, my stress levels dropped. I wear an Oura ring, which tracks biometrics, and I noticed some green restorative bars appearing as my heart rate decreased.
Even if I chose not to send this, the writing exercise had the desired effect—emotional recovery.
Here’s the thing: I believe most of the messaging you get from indie publishing around success is flawed.
Here are the biggest offenders…
Flawed messaging in indie publishing
“If I did it, you can too.”
This statement makes the outlier the norm.
You know my stance on this myth. While many authors who say it believe it, they fail to see the survivor bias in a marketplace where very few achieve financial success. The damaging part of the myth is that it leaves the majority thinking they did something wrong. Why aren’t they seeing stellar results?
“You just need to work harder.”
You don’t get the outlier result because you didn’t give enough. You weren’t committed or hustling hard enough.
All of that is nonsense.
I have experienced enormous successes and failures. I have a high capacity for handling risk and stress. None of that matters if I get into a downward spiral. My judgment will fail me, and I’ll act out of emotion, not reason.
Here is what I propose…
The importance of recovery rituals
Creativity is an elite profession. Your creative output is akin to that of the performance of a professional athlete. The significant difference is that you’ve been told the way to win is to work seven days a week, fifty-two weeks a year, constantly increasing production.
What sport works that way?
Is there extreme dedication and commitment? Absolutely.
But look at their actions… Professional athletes spend 80% of their time practicing and improving conditions and skills for the actual game. They focus a substantial amount of time on general and instantaneous recovery within the game.
Jim Loehr, the elite performance coach, could predict who would win a match not by watching the play but by observing the recovery rituals between points. The critical factor was the ability to reset and return to optimal performance as quickly as possible.
There will be great sessions at Author Nation on recovering from burnout and dealing with illness. Too often, this is after you’ve crashed at the bottom of a downward spiral. I’ve yet to see a performance system focused on the opposite, the upward spiral. This article isn’t just a message to help you but acted as a recovery process for me.
Here’s what I’ve discovered: We must honor our cycles—cycles of sleep, activity, recovery, creativity, as well as business cycles.
Understanding and optimizing for the oscillations in these cycles can make all the difference. This puts you in an upward spiral rather than a downward one.
Yes, an upward spiral.
Rather than the myth that your business must always go up and to the right, you understand that your business trajectory is an upward spiral with the upward and rightward movement at the center. You naturally move with your active and rest periods to accelerate and conserve momentum.
See how this is different?
Remember how, earlier in this article, I mentioned Suze and I have been getting professional help with our marriage? That’s hard to admit. It feels like you are failing if you have to get help, making it harder to get help and easier to go into a downward spiral.
I was thinking that way until it hit me.
If this single relationship is the most important in my life, why wouldn’t I want to invest in improving it?
Why do I think after twenty years of marriage, I know anything about what’s next or that I’m not so deep in the weeds that I can’t see forest or trees when it comes to my partner’s needs?
To spiral upward, we need to improve. To have the optimal marriage, why not bring in a coach? Tap into the resources of someone who has made their vocation helping others in this space. Someone who helps me learn from the trials and tribulations of others. I tell you all this to help you see there is no failure in admitting you need help. In fact, it can become your strength when you get help from a great resource.
Introducing Oscillations: A Guide to Peak Creative Performance
So what about this book?
I’ve already begun discussing the ideal of peak creative performance with my private clients. It has led to some interesting discussions and has helped me with my research.
Next season, paid newsletter subscribers will receive my pre-published manuscript of Oscillations: A Guide to Peak Creative Performance.
Next season will feature weekly exercises that turn the book into a performance system. You’ll get actionable insights and strategies to implement in your own creative processes.
If this interests you and strikes a chord, please let me know what you think. Do you have similar experiences, or are you also exploring what it takes to improve your performance? Are you interested in exploring the ideas of creative peaks and valleys with me?